Dear Papi

Dear Papi
Hola mijos! It's 1999 and what a great year it will be! I know this year will be the best one ever for you! Your dear ol' Papi is happy to know that whatever is on your mind, you can count on me to give you father-to-son advice-even if it includes boy troubles. I'm always here for you so ask me anything-good or bad-that's on your mind. Happy New Year!

Dear Papi,
I'm an 18-year-old firme Latino guy from Santa Barbara. I have a friend that I really like, but the thing is that I think I'm not good enough for him. I'm afraid of telling him I like him because he might reject me. What should I do? Should I spill my guts out now or should I die loving him?
-A Firme Lonely Guy

Dear Firme Lonely Guy,
Spill your guts now. Talk to your friend, and tell him you like him a little more than he knows. Ask him how he feels about that! Mijo, it's better to know now than to put your heart on hold. Whatever he says, compliment yourself for taking a chance! And one more thing, it hurts Papi's ears to hear you say you are not good enough for him. Change your thinking! You have to think you are worthy of any guy. Your thoughts reflect how you act so keep your head up high and remind yourself of your worth. Good luck!


Dear Papi,
I am a Mexicano who is proud to be QV, and I'm lucky that my brothers, sisters, and mother have accepted this fact. It has made our bond as a family even stronger. But there is one thing missing-mi Papi. He is the only one in the family who doesn't know I'm QV. Our relationship hasn't been the greatest over the years. It wasn't until I graduated from college that we formed the father-son relationship that I always longed for. But now I'm scared to tell him. I feel it's time he should know and not be left out. I know there is never a right time but ma keeps telling me it'll kill him cause he won't understand. He's from old Mexico, and it would crush his heart. What do I do papi? I think leaving him out would hurt him even more. I need your ayuda!!! Gracias.
-Eduardo de Chicago

Dear Eduardo,
You have a great advantage on your side! You have the support from a lot of your family members. So talk to your father and tell him to take a moment to understand that you love him, and that you need him to understand you-a little better. Tell him that you are a man filled with goals, a man who is ethical, and a man of goodwill, and a man who is attracted to the same sex. Encourage him to talk to the other family members and give him his space to think. Of course, coming out is not easy, but you have already done so, and you have the support, and in your case, it seems you want to tell him more than you don't-so when you are ready, go for it! Best of luck to you!


Dear Papi,
I am a half Mexican and half white 19-year-old. I love Latino boys, but every time I meet someone and end up liking them, they always just want to be friends. What should I do?

Dear John,
There are going to be plenty of guys that you will like, but who will only like you as a friend-that's just part of life. Of course, love takes two, and it hurts when only one side likes the other, but keep your heart strong, be confident, appreciate who you are, and in time, your confidence, self-acceptance, and positive attitude will attract you to the man of your dreams! Keep going, mijo!


Dear Papi,
I'm in my early twenties and out to all. I met someone a little over a month and a half ago. He's very cute and very dedicated to his studies-this I admire. Here's the problem: he rarely calls. When he does call, he acts like it's nothing. He asks me out and I accept. While we're together, it's fantastic. We kiss. We dance. He tells me he really likes me and can't wait to see me again, but then he doesn't call me. I'm getting mixed signals here. My best friend tells me I should forget him because it seems he only wants things done on his terms. I still want to get to know him. What am I to do?
-Dazed and Confused

Dear Dazed and Confused,
Talk to that guy-ahora! Tell him that you are getting mixed signals from him and that it confuses you when he says he's going to call, but doesn't. Be open to his response, because it might be that school is just taking too much of his time and it is time that's not giving him the chance for anything more. But maybe, he just doesn't want anything more, and if this is the case, then you should leave the situation. But before you forget him, talk to him one more time and ask him to clarify those mixed signals. Good luck!


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