The Latino Men's Journal—with over 1,000,000 visitors!

Dear Papi

Relationships! Relationships! Don’t you wish relationships weren’t so complicated? I mean, wouldn’t it be nice to find the right guy, the first time—and have everything turn out right? Well, life isn’t quite that simple. In reality, it’s all about learning and growing, and believe me, with relationships, you certainly learn and grow. So whatever is happening to you in your life right now, let me know. E-mail me at


Hey Papi,
I am involved with someone right now who I’ve known for a year. We are very committed, but I recently met someone else and we started a great friendship together. This guy has a lot of great things about him and things have begun to get more personal between us. We feel we can’t be together because we are involved with others in our life. But it feels great and I think I love this guy. What’s the best solution? My intention is not to hurt anyone. I care a lot about both of these guys.

Dear Mijo,
I think you need to reflect on how you really feel about each of these two men. You say you’re very committed with the man you’re currently dating, but you also say that you think you love the other guy? Que te pasa? Look, how would you feel if you were in your man’s shoes? Would you like it if he began falling in love with someone else but didn’t tell you? Although your intention is not to hurt anyone, it may be too late for that—especially for your boyfriend. You need to be honest with everyone involved, including yourself. I think you may need to take some time away from both guys so you can sort out your feelings. But you need to make a decision quickly because the longer you draw this out, the worse it will be for everyone. I know it’s a difficult situation, but it just wouldn’t be right to allow it to get any more complicated than it already is. Good luck, mijo.


Dear Papi,
I’m a 20-year-old Latino from Los Angeles. I work for a well-known package delivery company (brown trucks highly recognizable). This one guy I work with is about to get married to his long-time girlfriend. My problem is that in the course of getting to know all my coworkers I have found out that this guy is interested in sowing his wild oats before getting married. While that’s normal for some guys, this guy has expressed some interest in me. He told me that he’s never felt like this for any guy, and that he didn’t even know he was interested in guys until he met me. Now, he’s asked me if I would like to “go out” with him someday for dinner. What should I do? Should I go for it? By the way, he is very handsome. Please help. —United Papi Services.

Dear Papi Services,
It sounds like you might be getting a package delivered to you with a plaque saying Home-Wrecker! Just kidding, mijo. But all joking aside, look at the bigger picture: This guy is about to be married to a woman and the relationship you may begin with him will probably be just “messing around.” Mijo, why are you going allow yourself to be put in a predicament where there’s a 99.9% chance that you’ll just get played? Ademas, don’t forget that there are other people involved here and this may have the potential to do great harm to the man and his fiancée. I realize that the thought of being with a “straight” guy is a real turn-on for a lot of us QV guys, but try to think with that head above your shoulders, not the other one. And besides, there are plenty of other guys out there who are just as handsome, if not more handsome, than this UPS boy who are probably more interested in you the person than just your sexy legs in those brown shorts!


Dear Papi,
So check it, I live in Dallas, TX, and there are no Latinos here at all! Although Texas is the state with the second-most Latinos in the whole U.S., there doesn’t seem to be any Latinos here. Do you know of any places where Latinos chill at in my city? —Chillin’ in Dallas

Dear Chillin,
You may not realize it, but you’re living in a town with a fast-growing number of Latinos! No matter what scene you’re looking for, it shouldn’t be too hard to find Latinos who share common interests with yourself. I’d recommend starting out by checking the resource listings and club listings in the back of this issue. You can also check out the QV web page for even more resources or do a search on Google. In addition, I know that Dallas is one of the few cities in the country that has a Latino radio call-in show called Sin Fronteras which airs Sunday nights starting at 10pm on 89.3 FM. You might want to give it a listen to see if they discuss any resources you can check out. But in general, I’d suggest just keeping your eyes peeled because those fine QV Dallas papi chulos are definitely out there.



qvMagazine: The Latino Men's Journal | Copyright 1997-2003
tel: 818.766.0023 | fax: 509.471.6520 | email: