PAPI IS IN!
you ever wished relationships werent so complicated? I mean, wouldnt
it be nice to find the right guy, the first time, then fall in love
and have everything turn out right? Well, life isnt quite that
simple. Its all about learning and growing, and believe me, with
relationships, you certainly learn and grow! So whatever is happening
to you in your life right now, let me know. E-mail me at DearPapi@qvMagazine.com
I am a 23-year-old Latino who is very confused. I have been out of a
relationship for almost six months now. I thought I was over my ex,
but just recently, my feelings for him came back. I find myself thinking
about him all the time. It gets so bad that I end up not going to work,
not leaving my house, and not even leaving my room. I know that its
bad to be doing what I am doing, but I cannot seem to stop thinking
of him. Help me! I am living in a rut, and I feel like I am trapped.
How do I get over him?
You need to move on! It doesnt do you any good to miss work, stay
home, or even stay in your room alone. Those things are just putting
you further into debtemotionally. I want you to be strong and
say things or even do things that will help you. In other words, say
to yourself is, Yes, I miss my ex, but Im a strong person,
and I will move on. Or surround yourself with friends or family,
who will be there for you. Or you can fill your schedule up with proactive
activities. This means, going out with your friends, going to the movies,
or even going to the gym to get some exercise. Just remember that it
takes time to get over a relationship, and during this time, I want
you to surround yourself with things that will support you emotionally.
Once again, be strong, be active, and you will see that youll
get through all of this. Good luck, mijo!
I have been together with my man for over five years, and we just got
married. He is my first, and I am his. But, here is the dilemma. The
day after the wedding, I went to a QV pride festival with my homies,
and I found myself looking and flirting with other vatos. Is it just
because I am tied down now or is it just because I still have that player
side in me? I played on him three times before we got married, and I
dont want to mess up now. I do care about him, and I do love him.
Can you please help me! Latin Thug
As hard as it may be to say this, when you entered into this marriage,
you were well aware that you made a commitment to be there for your
husband, and that, of course, monogamy was part of the deal. From what
I can see here, its not worth giving up a man who youve
been with for over 5 years, and who has promised you his life through
marriage, just for a little bit of fun with someone else. My advice
to you is work on your commitment and be faithful to your man.
Im a 22-year-old Latino who is about to move out of my parents
home and venture into the real world for the first time.
To this day, I have not come out of the closet to my parents when the
time is right, I will be completely truthful to them. Right now, Im
going to be moving with a real good QV friend, who sometimes acts kind
of queeny. Because of this, Im kind of hesitant to
have my parents come over. I have asked my friend in the past that I
would really owe him big if he would just act masculine whenever my
parents were around. He has agreed. But I realize its not fair
to ask him to do that in a place that is just as much his as it is mine.
I wouldnt want anyone telling me how to act in my own place. What
should I do? Do you think its time for me to tell my parents?
Yours truly, scared Latino.
Youre right! It isnt fair to ask your roommate to act masculine
whenever your parents are around. Its like telling him to go back
into the closet, and thats not a good thing to ask anyone to do.
Just remember its your decision to move in with him, so accept
who youre choosingand try not to hide or change him. But
the bigger issue here is that you are still living a dual life, pretending
to be straight to your parents, and it seems as if you want to be truthful
to them by coming out to them. If so, consider talking to your friends,
or even a counselor to get support and ideas from them. You might be
in a better position to come out now than you have ever been before
since youll be living on your own, and you wont have to
worry about issues such as being kicked out of the house, etc. If anything,
once you do come out, at least, you will allow yourself to start living
an honest life, and thats the path I want you to take. Good luck,