The qvPapi Is In!
As your Dear
Papi, it's great to be here--to guide you and to help you in
any way I can! If you're experiencing boyfriend troubles, write
to me. I'll be more than willing to share my wisdom in your time
of need. E-mail me at DearPapi@qvMagazine.com.
Dear Papi,
I'm an 18 year old Latino living in South Florida. My problem
is that a very good friend of mine, who is a girl, wants to hook
up with one of my ex-boyfriends. She doesn't know that he's QV
or that he was once my boyfriend. She seems intent on hooking
up with him, but he's definitely not straight, and I don't want
to see her set herself up for a big disappointment. I want to
tell her about him, but I'm not sure if it's my place to out
my ex-boyfriend like that. What should I do? -SEC
Dear SEC,
You're right, it may not be your place to out your ex-boyfriend,
but what you can do is talk to your ex-boyfriend and let him
know about this girl. If your ex-boyfriend is not comfortable
coming out to her, then maybe he can gently tell her that he
is not interested in anyone at the present time. Of course, the
rejection will hurt your girl friend now, but the rejection will
allow her to move on-and to find someone who will be able to
love her the way she needs, and that's what may be best in this
scenario. Good luck!
Dear Papi,
I'm a 21 year old Latino male. My problem is that my best cousin
doesn't know that I'm QV. He's about 6 years older than I am,
and I look up to him. He just came to the U.S. from South America,
and now we're living together. I don't know how to tell him about
me. I've even introduced him to my QV best friend, who's a little
more noticeable than I am, hoping that my cousin will get the
hint, but I don't know if he has. Well, can you help me out?
-Juancho
Dear Juancho,
It seems as if you really want to come out to your cousin as
that would allow your cousin to really know and love you for
who you are. Before you do, please analyze the situation. Just
make sure your cousin is comfortable with QV people. In other
words, "test the waters" to see how he reacts, especially
if you bring up the subject of homosexuality. If he reacts favorable
to QV people, then slowly open the door for yourself. Eventually,
you'll be able to let him know that you are the same person as
before-with the same morals and values! Good luck, mijo, and
be strong.
Dear Papi:
Look at this: I have a boyfriend, and he's extremely jealous.
He keeps thinking I'm with other guys, when I'm not. He has a
tendency to hunt me down-everywhere I go. This relationship is
becoming harmful day by day. We've been together for three years
now, and I'm willing to end it. However, he tells me the jealousy
problem won't go away if I find another guy since all guys are
the same. It gets to the point where I feel completely lost.
What should I do? -Antonio
Dear Antonio,
When a relationship is bringing you constant fear, sadness, or
anger, then it's time to reconsider the relationship. You mentioned
your boyfriend said that even if you find a new guy, that the
jealousy problem won't go away since all guys are the same. I
completely disagree with him as there are plenty of relationships
where both men love each other and where there's trust-not jealousy.
You owe it to yourself to put yourself in a better situation
so talk to your man now because if he's not willing to give you
the trust you need, then find someone who will.
Dear Papi,
I've been with this man for over a year. He has been there for
me through my hard times. I was shot in the back and was paralyzed
for three months. At that time, we had been together for only
2 months, and he continued to be there and help me through it
all. He put up with all my sh!#, and he's the best guy I've ever
been with. Now I'm able to walk with a cane, and I need some
original ideas or romantic places to go-something that will show
my total appreciation for him. Thanks. -Healed by Love.
Dear Healed by Love,
There are plenty of things you can do to show your appreciation
for your man. You can surprise him by taking him out. The object
here, though, is that you don't reveal where you are going, but
let the night reveal itself. For example, you can suddenly end
up at a nice restaurant, then afterwards, end up at the beach
to watch the moonlight. Your man will be pleasantly surprised.
Or when your man comes home from work, you can surprise him with
some flowers and a special card filled with your words of appreciation.
Or you can sit outside and simply watch the sunset together!
Or drive up to a mountain to see the city lights. The options
are endless, but no matter what you do, just the mere fact that
you two will be sharing time together will make it all worthwhile.
Write to Dear Papi! Send an e-mail to
dearpapi@qvmagazine.com.
Please address all letters to Dear Papi.
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