Cultura | Fall 1997




So she speaks only Spanish

Nada mas, Ni una gota de ingles

And I must express to her, "Mommy I'm QV"

Pero no hay Palabras!


I can say, "Mama, soy Homosexual"

because it's the right word to say;

The correct word to express

Who I am.

But Spanish or English

The word homosexual (Emphasis on the word sex)

Never has appealed to my liking.


And so I think, and think again of some other words

That express the who that I am

But as much as I think

I cannot help but to think

That I should damn my native language, Spanish

And as much as I love it, I cannot avoid but to hate it

-for the time being-

Because the only other words to chose from

Are not words but insults.


I can say, "Mama, soy maricon,

joto, chifladito, curiosito, totrillera, una vieja

-usted sabe, uno de aquellos."


Pero no,

I am not "one of those"

As these insults tell me.

I am not about fucking boys or wearing dresses

or acting "like a woman" or having dildos

rammed up my ass!

There's much more to me than same-gender sex.


In fact,

I am still part of humanity!


But how do I tell my mama,

How do I make her comprehend that I am QV,

And still human,

Still a man?


How do I tell my mama

Who speaks only Spanish?

How do I make her comprehend?

Que yo no soy amor entre hombre y mujer...


...Homosexual, Que pinche palabra!


-Jesus Alonzo



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